Check-ins with your nanny

A nanny and family of three meeting at a kitchen table. The nanny has a notepad and pen. All participants look happy and engaged.

Having weekly or bi-weekly check-ins with your nannies can prevent turnover and help to maintain a healthy working relationship. These conversations can be difficult to navigate

  1. Set and reassess expectations

  2. Choose the right time to talk

  3. Stay positive and professional

  4. Prevent conflict before it happens

Set and reassess expectations

These check-in dialogues are designed to help both yourself and the nanny set expectations for the role. Like any job, these expectations may change and this is a good time to reassess your needs. Check in with yourself before these talks to create a short list of topics to go over. Be as prepared as possible to make this a productive meeting. As an employer of a nanny, this an amazing opportunity to build trust with your nanny. Ask them what their continued expectations of the role are. Keep in mind that it is important to continue touching base on this, as expectations will change.

CHoose the right time to talk

Be smart about when you are scheduling these sit downs. Here at Sommet, we recommend having a designated time scheduled in the week where there are no children involved. This could be during nap time, at the end of the day, or early in the morning before the children wake up. We don’t recommend having these conversations over text or the phone to make them as productive as possible. As we all know, things can be misconstrued when they are sent over text, so it is our recommendation that you hold these check-ins in person.

Stay positive and professional

These conversations can be simple check-ins to go over scheduling changes or weekly updates, but they can also be to address some challenges in the role. This can be difficult to approach, especially for employers that have never been in a supervisory role. In order to make these as positive as possible, you can implement a sandwich method. This means that you start the conversation off with something that your nanny does really well, transition to the point of improvement, and then finish off with another positive. This approach makes it feel like less of an attack, and more of a productive conversation. Before these check-ins, it is important to sit down and come up with a bulleted list of conversation points. This keeps everyone on track and prevents going off topic.

Approach this conversation from the perspective of being on the same team. Here at Sommet Nannies, it is our goal to see a fruitful and long-term placement for all of our nannies. This is only possible if both the parents and the nanny feel that they are part of the same team with the ultimate goal of providing exemplary childcare.

Prevent conflict before it happens

A nanny role is one that is very unique because it is always evolving. Children may be added to the family, school starts and ends, and ages of children change as well. This ultimately means that the families expectations of the nanny will evolve and change as well. This is another reason that these check-ins are so vital in maintaining a positive relationship. While the role likely won’t change from week to week or bi-weekly, be sure to stay on the same page. Ask your nanny if she’s noticed anything that has become more difficult to do, ‘how can we support you so this can be easier? Is there anything we can add to our grocery list to make lunches easier?” When our nanny noticed that traffic was getting significantly worst in the morning, we used our weekly check-in to assess whether or not it made sense for her to leave 15 minutes earlier and adjust morning hours to account for that. These small tweaks can make a massive impact on the role and can make your nanny feel appreciated and accommodated. While we certainly don’t want you to completely change your role to fit the needs of your nanny, there are small tweaks that can be made to make the role a bit easier. We expect our nannies to have the same flexibility, so if you need to adjust your schedule because you have a big project at work, bring this up in your check-in. We can’t expect our nanny to read our mind, so bring these things up on the front end to avoid burn out and frustration.

Overall, make open communication a habit and you will notice an obvious shift in team mentality. Having open communication and frequent check-ins will build trust, mutual respect, and set the tone for a healthy working relationship between yourself and your nanny.


Welcome to Sommet Nannies, a nanny agency with presence in Boston, Chicago, Washington DC, New York and nationwide. We help busy families find dedicated and caring college-educated nannies.

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